The PSAT's are tomorrow

Part of the fun of parenting is learning how to do it differently for different kids. S was a test-taking fiend, tearing up the scores, even prepping under duress, a National Merit Scholarship finalist.

M hates standardized tests, has done better on the ACT than the SAT, doesn't really care about being a National Merit Scholar. She had set big goals about her scores and her colleges, and so we bought online test prep and signed her up for a one-shot prep workshop. She did make it to the workshop, but has not touched the online prep.

And I have to let it go, even though the PSAT's are tomorrow. She works so hard, up past midnight almost every night and up before 6 each morning, doing homework. It is her future, not mine. She already has an ACT score of 30, good enough to get into all but the top tier schools. Unlike her younger years, these years are the ones where she is shaping her future by her choices. I can force her to give up her extracurriculars, her small group Bible study, her singing, but that would only make her less of who she really as, as well as punish our relationship.

At this point I need to remember myself, and remind her, that while she should pursue her goals and her dreams she needs to keep in mind that God is sovereign over all. Her eventual choice of college, her future career, her future husband -- God already knows all these things. And they are all going to work for good for her (Romans 8:28).

So I respect who she is, try to make sure she knows that she does not have to be her brother. Try to help her know how wonderful and precious and cherished she truly is.